Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Gripe of the Day: Cell Phones on the Sidewalk - Just Say No!

Today's blog post comes from not me, but from another friend of mine who's had it with cell phones on the sidewalk. Never mind trying to drive with them, people can't even walk with them. Here it is:

We used to say of particularly clumsy and graceless souls, "He can't
walk and chew gum at the same time." Fine, but how about walking and
using the cell phone at the same time? Let's be explicit about the

1. Do not get so involved with your conversation that your body
wanders instead of your mind and you weave from side to side on the

2. Even if you have discovered that the man of your dreams went home
at 1:30 in the morning with a shot girl on West Broadway, do not throw
your arm dramatically as far to the left (or right) as it will go.

3. Do not jerk yourself to the left or right on the sidewalk as you
reach into pocket or bag to retrieve a ringing phone.

4. Do not come to an abrupt and complete stop in the middle of the
sidewalk in order to dial a number. Your jacket, fashionable as it no
doubt is, is adorned neither with brake lights nor directional

I do not expect my fellow citizens to cure cancer or to bring peace to
the world or to solve the intractable tension between full employment
and inflation, but is "straight line, steady pace" too much to ask?


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